Weekly blog #8 "Being Mean...& What not?"

   Apparently I'm mean. Or so I am told. Hysterically enough, one of my English classes told my English teacher that I was 'mean'. When she asked them what they meant, they told her that I got after them for talking and packing up early and therefore I was 'mean'. This was by far the highlight of my week. She told me that she laughed when they told her this and then told them that she also did that all the time and much worse!  It was a good lesson to me that first must come the relationship and then comes the respect. The students respect my teacher and have a good relationship with her and therefore do not complain when she gets mad at them, but when I do it, they are hurt. This was a funny moment for me, but my teacher reassured me, "It's better to be mean, than a pushover."
      Something that surprised me this week was how diverse the same lesson can be for two different class periods. I always knew that lessons would vary based on the different students in a class but I figured out this lesson even more this week when i was leading a discussion for each class period. Some discussions were incredible and needed very little prompting from me. Other class periods couldn't get passed the first question without needing assistance. This taught me how to be flexible and move with the class the way that it needs to move. For some periods, it is success if they have simply read the chapter. In other periods, it is success if they can analyze the author's purpose behind the chapter and so on and so on. I was able to learn, rather quickly, not to expect the same thing from class to class. I truly had to treat every class like its own entity.
      One thing that I saw this week that I would like to adopt is having students read their books outloud as a class. We had the option of either having just the teacher read, having them read in groups, or having different students take turns reading aloud and the last one was definitely the most profitable. We were able to read more, discuss more, and the students had a better knowledge about what was going on. This definitely took up the entire class period and was more work as the teacher, but if the students are gaining more from this style then I think it is the right one. We also changed our styles of reading the book from period to period. We differentiated the instruction based on what the students truly needed. This was good for me to see because it helped me to realize that everythingt doesn't have to be planned out the same way nor do we have to cover the same material from period to period. As long as the students are learning what they are supposed to be the end of the year, then the structure of the class isn't applicable.

Field Experience Summary

                                                                Summary of Field Experience
            I feel very blessed to be in the position in life that I am currently in. Teaching is becoming a habit and a continued state of living. The more time I spend in the high school, the more comfortable I am there and the more desire I have to stay there. This quarter’s field experience has not been the easiest quarter for me, but has definitely been the most educational. There was many times where I felt inadequate and unwelcome. This was mostly because of the students and their ability to test and try me on a daily basis. I learned more about myself and my goals and desires as a teacher than I did about content areas or teaching patterns.
            I have learned the impact that teachers can have on their students. Positively or negatively, each teacher has the power to mold their students, whether they know it or not.  All teachers have different teaching styles and I have learned that I need to figure out exactly what teacher I want to become. I am learning more about myself as a teacher and through the positive and negative examples of teachers that I see around me, I am developing a clear picture of how I want to be seen as a teacher.
             I have seen that as a teacher you have many different hats to wear. You are the teacher, the friend, the counselor, the disciplinary, the coach and always a role model. I have seen teachers jump quickly from one role to the next and it is eye-opening to see just how much of yourself you have to put into your teaching. You simply cannot teach the content and expect that that is all you will do. Even though gaining knowledge through the content is one of our primary objectives as teachers, it cannot be all that is focused on. I have seen teachers who focus simply on the content and fail to relate it to their student personally. This could be an easy overlook in the daily learning objectives but it has helped me to see that I want everyone lesson to have a real-life applicable meaning. I have also learned that teachers are not perfect. They make mistakes, as I did many times.  They don’t have every detail of every day planned out but if they have the knowledge and passion for what they are teaching then the messages will be heard in a positive light. I truly believe there is no greater calling in life than to be a teacher.
            Even on my most difficult days teaching I still was able to grow as an individual and a teacher. I learned that I can push myself further than I thought possible. I have always felts that my content in some areas are not as strong as others, but I have learned that through patience and perseverance I can teach any subject, as long as I have the dedication and desire to do so. It was the times where my teacher would encourage me to take over a discussion, even though I felt I didn’t know how to direct it to a good path, when I gained a sense of self and independence as a teacher.
             I have always wanted to be a teacher and have never questioned that logic or thought process. It always seemed like such a sure thing. There were definitely days when I thought, “Why am I doing this?” There seemed to be no logical explanation as to why I had even taken this path. As I have been working more with Elementary aged students at my job I have also begun to wonder why I chose secondary aged students from the beginning. Through this quarter I have remembered why I chose this profession. I am in it for the challenge. I want to watch students of all ages and levels grow into the best students and individuals that they can become.
            I want to be the teacher who wouldn’t quit when everyone else did. I want to be the teacher that inspires and motivates students to do and be better. At the end of the day, I could care less whether or not my students know how to properly use a comma or can recite the health and skill related components of fitness. I simply want my students to learn; to learn about life, to learn about them, and to learn how to make a difference. I am proud to be a teacher and proud to be at the high school level. They stretch me on a daily basis and teach me things that I never would have known otherwise. There may be a day in the future when I get my Elementary Ed license and choose to teach younger ages but for now I am very happy with where I am and wouldn’t change it for anything.      
            The school itself demands a certain level of respect from you as a teacher. All schools vary due to students, environment, teachers, and specific curriculum taught. As teachers we associate ourselves with a specific school, school district, principal, etc. As members of that society, it is our job to uphold the characteristics or a teacher both on and off the campus. I have learned that a school is far more than a building that you learn or teach at. Being part of a school is like being part of a family. You all need to work together to make the family functional and successful. I haven’t had a lot of time to really engage into the school activities and become a part of the Lewis & Clark family but I fully intend to this Fall, as I will have much more free time on my hands.
            There are many lessons that I have learned through this past quarter, but the one that I would pass on to another student is to not be step out of your comfort zone and build personal relationships with students. I have gotten close to some students near the end of the quarter, but it took me far too long to learn names or gain relationships. This could be due to the fact that my life is insanely busy but regardless building those relationships is what makes you a better teacher. I wish I would have spent more time getting to know my students. Looking back it is hard to even think of times I would have had free to do this, but I know that making the time and effort to do it would have made all the difference.
            I would also say to not be afraid to make mistakes. I am a perfectionist and struggle with this on a daily basis, but when I was able to admit my faults to myself and to my cooperating teacher about my teaching, I was truly able to learn and grow. My cooperating teachers have both been wonderful to work with. They ask for my input and allow me to lead discussions or games when possible. I also have learned that I can contribute positively to my cooperating teacher’s career as well. I would say don’t be afraid to offer up ideas and new teaching styles. Teaching is an evolving profession and it is something that we can easily contribute to and make better. I have a lot of fun ideas about physical education and ways to improve the structure of the course at Lewis & Clark. I have been able to bring up my ideas with my cooperating teacher and hopefully I will be able to incorporate some of it throughout my student teaching. As long as we have the passion, knowledge and dedication, we cannot fail. Teaching is what we make of it and I for one want to be innovative and make a difference not only in my classroom but in the field of education as a whole.
            I have also learned a lot through my opportunity to be observed. Both observers that I had gave me excellent feedback and were extremely positive and uplifting. You are able to learn so much more about your teaching when you can discuss it with someone who knows the ins and outs of the profession. I love constructive criticism and I know that I can continue to get better and better if I lean upon those fellow teachers and mentors that I have surrounding me. Like I mentioned earlier, being a teacher is being part of a family, an extremely smart family for that matter. We can constantly build on one another’s wisdom and discover the best ways to teach our students.